The programs, your programs.
Many times, the things and situations that happen to us in this world are things we don't want to experience; in fact, we don't understand why they happen to us. We ask ourselves questions like, "Why is this happening to me?" "Don't I deserve this?" It's always the same. "I don't know what else to do," and all the other phrases you can think of. Nobody has a definitive answer. You go to many places trying to understand. But as the Course says, the ego wants you to search and not find.
The Course gives you the solution, the remedy that God gave us. It explains it very clearly and precisely.
Programs. What are these programs? The answer is simple. As you grow up, you go through situations in your life—it can be any situation you experience—and you create a program for yourself. That program keeps popping up, and you can't avoid it; it's there, buried deep inside, without you even realizing it. Let me give you an example. Your father is or was a dictator; you have to survive that. One day you lower your head and the problem is solved; the shouting disappears, even the hitting, and you decide to do nothing to prevent it all. Two programs. One tells you to lower your head, the other tells you to do nothing. The thing is, at that moment you weren't able to see other solutions. Are you to blame? Of course not.
Life goes on, your programs continue, and you don't understand what's happening. You hear other people tell you: don't lower your head and do something with your life. You try, but the program(s) are there, and on top of that, there's that feeling of constant failure. I can't take it anymore.
The solution is in the Course. Atone for the programs. Programs you don't even know are there. You have to learn to atone. Seek and find. There are many things you can atone for yourself; for others, you may need a teacher from God to help you.
To atone means to undo. Undo the program. Only Jesus can do that. I just don't believe in him. He's not important. You want to improve, and he responds happily.